I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize