I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
