I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
