Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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