he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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