I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
