ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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