he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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