woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize