community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
