You made me cry and you don't even care
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize