I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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