i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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