Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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