I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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