In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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