i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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