i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
