i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
