STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
