Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize