Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
