I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
