She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
