Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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