sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
