Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Couch. On fire.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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