I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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