all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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