You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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