FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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