I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
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