And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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