He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
