I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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