Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize