she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
