Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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