David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
