Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
My Sexting was not on an AP level
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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