but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
