I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
