How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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