i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize