Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
