Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
