I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
