she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
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