We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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