Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
